Shit Man

I was walking on Edgewood Avenue in Atlanta. I was on my way to a brunch at some fancy restaurant. The brunch only cost twenty five cents for all you can eat, a minimum of two drinks- a mimosa or a bloody mary- was supposed to be met but not necessary. They called it a 'bailout brunch'. The brunch started at 12:30. A lengthy line built up waiting for the door to open. I was near the front when this homeless guy- standing about fifteen feet from me- in a steadfast, unashamed, feverish-manner dropped his pants exposing his entire package, balls, penis, and whatever else- began to take a piss. A cop from inside the place ran him off; the homeless man said something inaudible, the cop responded "no shit."

An hour later I finished eating.

I made my way through the sea of wealthy looking people and went outside.

On the trek back to the car my friend suddenly said, "watch out for that," I stepped in something slippery, "shit," he concluded. Across the street the same homeless man who showed off his penis and balls was laughing hysterical. He proclaimed with excitement, "you stepped in my shit man!" I dragged my foot on the street, in grass, in puddles, and gravel making sure to get all that crap off.

Twenty minuets later I was drinking coffee, beer, and looking at Salvador Dali's art.